Valentine's Day 2021

Yesterday was Valentine’s Day.  A day spent walking around the house and picking up heart shaped scraps of paper, some fully and some incompletely colored in pink, some with and some without note "Happy Valentine's Day", "I love you Amma", or "I love you Appa", and one with a cryptic message: "I love Shrew" accompanied by a pink marker sketch of a weird tadpole-like creature.  Valentine's Day is a big deal for Medha, mostly because it has been made a big deal by her school teachers, classmates, and other friends.  Contrastively however, Valentine's Day meant nothing to me growing up.  There was a brief period during college days when it turned into an occasion of a somewhat lukewarm significance, but even then, Days like Rose Day and Tie & Saree Day asserted more gravity among college goers seeking indulgence in kittenish flirtation and coquetry than Valentine’s Day did.  Besides, Valentine’s Day shindigs in India were generally coincident with combatant remonstration by the moral police, so participating in said shindigs came with an inherent sense of shame.  

My view of Valentine's Day has remained largely apathetical.  I didn't have much of an opinion relative to it while in India, and I don't maintain any position on it now after moving to the US either.  One thing that does strike me is the ubiquity of its celebrations in the US and the equitable emphasis given to connotations beyond the romantic, essentially confuting the very basis of the anger nurtured by the aforesaid moral police in India.  That being said, there is one custom that neither Pavana nor I have been able to get on board with.  A custom that is central to Valentine’s Day, and any other day of celebration of love for that matter.  And that is gifting each other worldly paraphernalia like roses, chocolates, and the like.

Speaking of gifting, a wise memester (or is it memesmith?) characterizes the journey of love as the evolution over time of botanic purchases for your partner in love.  Quite accurate, in my opinion.  Couples do evolve over time.  For instance, fifteen years ago, as juvenile daters who were in decent amount of love but only vaguely aware of each other’s likes and dislikes, Pavana and I would buy each other the objects that would fall into the category of worldly paraphernalia referred to above.  With time however, this disposition was rectified, owing to some caustic reactions to the gifts, such as these:

"Why bouquet?  You could have bought a flower pot instead, at least I would have planted it!"

"Card-a?  Chumma waste.  Also.. OMG, it's $4.99?"

"Why this chocolate?  I don't like Hershey's.  You could have bought me Lindt na."

And so on.

So, what did we do this year for Valentine's, you ask?  I stayed true to the above memester's law, went to Aldi, and bought cilantro and ginger.  Pavana made some excellent Mangalore buns with shunti chutney for lunch, and delicious raw mango rice for dinner (this included a customary argument relating to rice steaming skills and efficient use of kitchen vessels and utensils).  Valentine's Day special.  To make it even more special, Medha was served heart shaped buns on an amateurishly decorated plate, and we both yelled "Surprise!" when she entered the kitchen.

I guess we have evolved.